Let His will be done

Okay.... this is a trial from God and maybe this is His will.
I will NOT question this time and moment.


I accept it as it is beyond my reach.


I will MOVE ON and live my life in a better way.


Everything happends for a reason.


Aunty Yee Li once said that if you are having a comfortable life, means you have to start evaluating everything especially your spiritual life.


So I reckon I should be glad that I can't seem to sit well most of the time now.


I am not blaming anyone especially God. If this is His will, eventhough I am most reluctant, I will see it through by His grace!


And even now in a "low" time of my life, I will give Him thanks and praise for His love is ever so real and there for me.


For I know He will never put me through something I can't handle.


Sure, there will be oceans of tears and weeping, anger and pain, suffering and sorrow, resentment and heartaches. But that is life. We grow through experience and trials.


And if somethings are meant to be, then by the Lord's will... it will come to past and future.


For to take a step ahead is to leave the step before. As hard as it is to lift my feet up, I will do it - even if I have to chop it off! * I am scaring myself here*


I guess by putting in all in the Lord's hands we receive patience to wait what really lies ahead of us, peace in times of turmoil and grace in times of depression.


We all know (at least we Christians) that we are to put the Lord first in our lives. Many have confessed it, said it, and "lived" by it. But how many of us have really done it?


Many of us think we are doing it, and many of the same people are actually not really doing it.


Get my point?


I can tell you not many of us have really done it in our lives. Especially in this world, this superficial, greedy and artificial world.


I can honestly tell you I haven't done that, and once before, I was more than reluctant to even think of it. For I was thinking...."Everytime we dedicate our lives to God, we falter all over again..." And it is common.


But we should slowly start to do that... to put Him more in our lives and eventually make Him apart of it permanently!


And then we will see that life in times of hurricanes can still be joyful and bearable (and more!) for He lives in us and hence, when we have Him with us, nothing can be against us!!! Amen!


I just dont know how to put it in words. It is all jumbled up inside of me! Lets just say... the main point here is:


This is a hard time for me and as much as I am hurt, angry, upset and sad.... I can't change what is happening. I can only rely on the "Big Daddy" up there. And pray that he will give me joy in the midst of sorrow, hope in the midst of despair and peace of mind when all seems to go haywire!


Two days ago, I couldn't seemed to even pray properly. I was too upset and refused to let the Lord take control. I just wanted to whallow in my own tears and "hoped" the Lord would have pity on me and set things right.


But He works in mysterious ways and I can only trust in Him....trust and have faith that there will be a rainbow of promise after this dreadful storm.


But now it is time to let go....


To give Him my tears, my heartaches, my false hopes, my anger, my sorrow, my pain and my heart.


And have it exchanged, for the better fruits of life. To prepare myself for His plan for me in the future.


Sometimes the times we rely in Him the most is when we are naked in tears and He is our only reliable shelter. And thats why we go through storms, but after that, with Him, we see a brighter side of the rainbow and live a better life.


After saying so much, I am still rather and very much reluctant to let go. I can tell you honestly I am as stubborn as a donkey! I know what I must do but my flesh is just too heavy. But in the end, each creation will have to meet its Maker again. To be broken out of the past, mould with new hope and made whole by His love.



No matter what the trial is, joy comes with Him in your heart....