Currently Listening to:
From The Inside Out
by
Hillsong.
The Potato realises that she has a tendency to be able to blog in the wee hours of the morning before a big event or trip (refer to previous posts for evidence). Don't ask me, I don't know why. It's 3AM in the morning and I am expected to 'rise and shine' in 3 hours time (6AM!) to get ready for Eaglepoint Damansara's first church camp in Genting View Resort (Praise the Lord for it!)! But here I am again unable to catch ZZZZ and resulting to put my midnight thoughts into virtual words
If you've noticed, the Potato has rarely blogged bout anything personal or private anymore. She used to go all emo on it (boy, when I read my previous blog, I can't help but blush!) and never fails to notify the entire cyber world (those who bother) of her petty little life musings and gaga-ness. But nope, not now anymore. At least not recently or lately. This must be the reason of her lack of updates. She has been so caught up with things; up and down, that she has gotten so weary and almost nonchalant to bother anymore. It's hard enough to sort and contain them properly inside her let alone being able to lay it out straight for the world to see. She guesses that when you grow up, when you encounter another phase or stage, things just change. You try to cope with the new stuff while balancing the old or finding wisdom to know if you should keep it. Is she just being complicated? Or just too plain to be comprehended
NOTE: If you find it hard to understand the language or phrasing of sentences, do excuse the Potato, she has not compose any writings lately and is somehow retardedly unsure of her English. Just fresh off 3 months after her last semester and her brain has already started to rust. How shameful of her. :P
I wish I could put the Potato to sleep.
She needs her sleep.
I need her to sleep.
But recently she's been going through this whole 'phase' whereby she only dozes of after tossing and turning in bed for hours, thinking of the most ridiculuous things and end up having nightmares of it
It's funny really, before this, she was hibernating like a log (after the recovery from the horrible illness couple of weeks ago) all the time and now she could barely remember how to sleep.
Waking up to lingering dreams (nightmares still?) of whatever the world holds for her then just ain't the cupcake starter of her day. No wonder she's a bit sotong lately. 'Otak takde centre'.
There are good days and there are days where they ain't.
But it's okay.
She's okay.
She will be okay.
She may be far from perfect. But she has a perfect God. :)
She just needs to stop dwelling in her weaknesses and start to rely on His stength instead.
I believe in You.
In Your promises in my life.
In Your love and goodness
Forgive me for ever doubting.
