Bittersweet Symphony

Currently Listening to:

I Still...

by

Backstreet Boys.

It's okay... It will be okay.

I promise...?

Dreams to Dreams....

Currently Listening to:

You'll Be In My Heart

by

Phil Collins

(OST: Disney Original Movie: Tarzan)

"What'cha gotta say??"

A Bouquet of Wild Daisies

Currently Listening to: Lahaina by The Volcanos (Lilo and Stitch: Island Favourites)


I am blogging again.... yeap. What can I say? It's gotta be PMS or that I am just so freakingly bored and lame. But who cares, sick people have all the time of the day when they not sleeping their heads off. I still can't bring myself to have the motion to blog about my 5th day in Cambodia. Maybe I am still lazy in editing and uploading the pictures but I hope I'll finish it when the 'Strawberry storm' has past.

I feel kinda emo and self concious lately. And yes, you all must know PMS is my constant shadow lately. And maybe that's why my sense of sensitivity has ascended majorly. And I can't help feeling like a pregnant woman with lotsa hormones. I start to get over upset for the tiniest things and tend to over-react inside with over thinking of problems that doesnt exist or shouldn't be. It sucks. A lot. So guys, love your girlfriends more and know you're not the only one suffering and facing the annoyance of PMS (when they throw bitch-fits). It's just the hormones and just so you know, it's what drives you crazy over them too. So all is fair.

Looks like I am going to be on problematic future girlfriend huh? Tehee.... let's hope I will be blessed with one super understanding and loving boyfriend to tolerate me then. LOL!

I despise PMS... it's a 'rotten pumpkin' and I am a constant slave to it... Can't imagine how I'll be when I'm pregnant instead. LOL! Note to self in 5 years time (5 years? who am I kidding?)... Love my husband MORE (Please let me be married then!!! - again, who am I kidding? :P)! LOL!

I am so craving for seaweed now... lotsa crispy Korean or Japanese seaweed... Hmmm mmm...!

Soup too, lotsa nice sweet seaweed soup.... like the one my granny makes. My mouth or should I be more specific, throat; is tasting like some weird stinking anti-biotic and I seriously need some ajinamoto...LOL!

I just finished watching Grey's Anatomy and Cashmere Mafia and it was great, love it. Totally superb for a PMS night and it got me all high up and preppy thinking that I might have a chance of making my life into a soap opera. But hey, all I'm lacking if a McDreamy of a boyfriend and a Cashmere coat... or maybe just some elegance in my life.

I think I kinda sound like a sour drama queen. Maybe so, but just for this moment. For once, I wanna bask in my own prima donna-ness... so sue me! But then again, I have this icky feeling that the whole world already hates me for some bitchy reason. :P PMS? You tell me...



You know what I want? What I really really want?

I want someone I can securely cuddle up to and leave all my stuffs behind. Someone who'll give me enough comfort to strip away all my insecurities and just let me be myself wholely in his arms. Someone who knows me, understands me, holds no judgement against me, accepts me and just truly loves me. And me to him. Someone like my.....

my hubby bubby pink bolster!!!!!! :D

Yeap, that's my sayang... for now.
And someday, God's gonna bless me with a real man instead. :)
And I shall wait for that beautiful day to come. :D

"....and then, her PMS just faded away for the night, in sweet thought of His promise to her."

Miao me up and Purr me away!

I GOT BULLIED BY A FREAKING-FAT-YET-CUTE-AND-HIGHLY-ADORABLE-PLUS-REGAL-BUSHY-TAILED-PERSIAN-CAT TODAY!!!

I find it to be very interesting but at the same time embarassing and stupid!

The story begins in this evening when I was trying to put my hunny bunnies back into their cages. On alternate days, I would release them unto the porch to exercise and to play around (cant confine them all the time) and by night, I would place them back. When I was getting ready and opening the cages, I noticed a certain dark and interesting shadow on my left (I didnt on the porch light then, I was pretty dark). I looked closer and lo, behold: It was a big dark brown and very fat persian cat laying on the porch's corner with it's yellow collar bell twinkling, eyeing on my babies. Oh yes.... You can practically smell the grim-ness in the dark night.

I grin-ed! The thing is, I love cats, especially big fat ones who happen to be really bushy and being a persian in a double plus! If you guys have not read an old post, I once said I stalked a domestic cat in my neighbouhood and that particular kitty happends to be sitting on me porch this very night.... "bonding" with my babies!

I hope it was not having any ill feelings towards my bunnies, but then again, if it did, it would have attacked long ago. So anyway, it was just starring at them and I too did the same except I was starring at it. My fingers got itchy and I wanted to pet it so badly. I love cats but my mum never did, so hence I never got much exposure to it in my life. I tried approaching it, but it moved a few inches away, indicating I was not a comfort party.

NVM!

I then quietly sat there... the the middle of the porch (the light was on then..) at night and tried to blend in.... I started to talk to my bunnies and petted them all the time while they were running around me. Hoping that I "got into the picture", I started scooting closer to the kitty and behold.... I PETTED IT!!!

And for a moment there I thought I was doing a pretty good job... It was responding and cats after all do love much affection and attention. So as I was happily petting it and thinking "hey, this is good.... my bunnies are such a good liaison...teheee.....", The kitty suddenly turn its head and.......

BIT MY HAND!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ouch!!!

The up-side of it was it didn't hurt much but it left a red long scar on my wrist!

-_-"

I was a little pissed off and wanted to hector the bl**dy cat!

Internal thought then: ?*&^%$#@!?*&^%$#@!

Internal thought then 2: You come to my house un-invited, got rude and bit me when I tried to be nice to you???!!!!

Internal thought then 3: If you didn't like it then just walk away!

And then... after bitting me... the kitty made no intention of moving... it expected me to scoot off.....

I was like: "What the....!!!"

Act bossy some more....!!

But then again cats are arrogant, it's what gives them "grace" and pride.

But screw it for a moment... I was ricked off....it BIT ME! And I think I didn't do anything wrong and as a matter of fact, I treated it nice, I adored it!

Anyway... here comes the stupid part of me. Instead of shoo-ing it away or be mean, I succumbed to its "royal-ness" and blah away to my bunnies. My mum said I should just halau it and worse, use the broom.... cause it was not my fault and I have a right to do so... it masuk rumah orang some gigit orang wo....

Anyway, I took my bunnies back into their cages and guess what.... ??

Mr.Cool the Fatty Pump (my nickname to him) started to walk and take a "stroll" on my porch like he owned it! Most cats would usually run or scoot when people come to view (in my neighbourhood that is) but it totally ignored me! Okay, I admit... I LOST the battle in the beginning... I should have shoo-ed it when it bit me but I retreated. I guess I was too engrossed in having to come into contact or proximity with such a lovely cat (my dream cat!) that all I did then was just admire it despite my anger and pain. Bodoh I know (it was just very cute la).

So then after stroutching it's way around my porch, it settle underneath the porch's wooden stool, once again staring at my bunnies (in the cage). I gave it a minute or two before sprinkling drops of water on it which totally set it out in a bounce and leaped away.

And then I told me mum the whole story in which she concluded that I was "BODOH" for letting it "climb all over me". She said she would have halau-ed it with the broom...

Yup, I felt a little dumb la..... Should have bagi it some colour...ahem... if you know what I mean.

But anyway, it was a "fun" experience... Adoring beautiful cats certainly have beautiful prices to pay ey... Hahaha....

What a night....

Despite tonight, I still love cats, let's hope I don't get bitten again... :(

Sunsets On My Window

Currently Listening to:

Somewhere Out There

by Linda Ronstadt and James Ingram

(OST: An American Tail)


Drama.... it's a daily thing in life. You can either be a dramatic person or just have tonnes of it in your life. So which are you? Do you exaggerate most of the time? Or do you just have lots to put up with for real? I hate drama. It's one thing to watch it on TV and another to experience it. Drama, drama, drama. But it is a part of life. It is life... we experience it all the time. So what's the big deal about it? Don't need to be dramatic right? But what about intenal drama? What do you think of it? What of it? How of it? Is it worse than the other dramas? Far more suffering? Or just too dramatic for words or expression?

Internal drama. It kills you inside and leave you molting without anyone seeing or noticing it. It is the perfect killer, the optimum assasin without a trace of evidence. It rots you, rips you apart and sometimes it poisons your very mind. And before you know it, you've lost it. It is the battle within and sometimes you just don't know which stand you are to take. The war rages and before you can tell, little things inside starts perishing, dragging you slowly with it. Very slowly, it withers away in the night, leaving you bare and incomplete. How can two opposite sides co-exist in one mind? Has it come to the point of insanity? How can so much drama be conjured up in one thought?

Who are you? Who am I? Why are you torturing her so badly? Do you not feel tired? Why are you storing so much anger? Ill thoughts and pain? Let not it be harboured for destruction will come swiftly. It is near the corner. Yes, it is knocking on ones door.... Leave, please let it leave. Push it away. Send it away. Leave it. Abandon it. Her soul is weary. Let it loose. Let it fade away. I beg you. O I beg you... kill it. Destroy it, burn it! Let it rip with pain! Let it suffer till it ends! No mercy... no mercy... For she has none to give.